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Published on 20th February 2019

This is me!

When I was first asked to write a blog, I presumed I’d write about my professional life, I do have a lot to say about the learning and challenges of the last 20 plus years (I know, hard to believe I’m old enough to have worked that long right? {looks longingly at snapchat filtered photo and pretends it’s real})

But the truth is, I think I have a bit to get off my chest before I get to the work stuff.

You see, I’ve always thought I was a little bit odd. Not crazy odd, just that my brain seemed to act a little differently to “normal” people.
Others seemed to live their life in confident, self-assured bubbles. They didn’t trip over their own feet and bump into walls or spend time pondering why internal organs don’t move around (googled that one if anyone wants to know).

I thought I was the only person who worried when talking to friends that I was actually a bit boring. In fact, if we’re on the worrying thing, that it was only me who spent years worrying about things that hadn’t even happened – and funnily enough, never did.

I live my life quite contentedly in my own imagination, if you ever catch me with a little down time there’s a good chance there will be some sort of alien/zombie/extreme weather movie playing out in my head. (Queue the groan from my amazingly supportive teenage boys).

I am most comfortable in solitude but crave company. I say stupid things when I’m trying to be cool.

I make an effort to dress well, but never quite seem to get it right. I have a stupid sense of humour, a raft of insecurities, I find it virtually impossible to express emotion…..
Argh! Why can’t I just be NORMAL!

And then it hit me, none of us are normal. You guys aren’t all floating through life on a wispy cloud, beautiful, confident and trouble free.
We hide our imperfections and insecurities from the world because they make us feel vulnerable, we worry that they will make others value us less.
But we are creating our own problems. When we watch everyone else’s perfect lives through rose tinted social media glasses believing it to be reality, the only effect it can have is to leave us feeling even more inadequate than we already did.

So I’m asking you to take those glasses off when you look at me and that’s why I write these blogs. I am happy, positive and successful. I am strong, powerful and independent. But I am also self-critical, shy and insecure. I am clumsy, awkward and a bit of a geek.

My life is a mixture of amazing and hard work all muddled up together but you know what, I’m nailing it and you are too!

So in true Greatest Showman style….. This is me!

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